MMXXI - January

Jan 2 - Lebo (9)

First time out in the new year and Ben and I finally hit up Mt Lebanon Golf Course, a decent 9-hole that was only a 5 minute drive from my house. This could prove to be a great training ground for me to improve my game. Well maintained, close by, challenging but not difficult and a good workout with all of the hills.

When I pulled up to the parking lot a maintenance worker clocked me immediately and said I was crazy as I pulled my clubs from the trunk and started to button up my jacket. It was chilly, and there was a bit of a mist, and the sky was gray… but the air was fresh and clean and Ben and I seemed to have the place to ourselves. I started giggling as I approached the first tee box. It was instant joy, the chance to be outside for a couple of hours in January!

The first hole is a straight shot par 3 with a backstop to keep you from hitting into the neighborhood that surrounds the public course. I hit a 7 off a short tee and overshot the pin but stayed on the green. This is an Ace Cam hole and I wouldn’t be surprised if there is a not very exclusive club of golfers that have holed this. I was more than happy with my first shot but then chased my ball around the green which was just a bit faster than I would have guessed for how wet it was.

On the second hole I got nervy like I always do. I sliced my drive, almost into the fairway of the third hole which doubles back, but it wasn’t unmanageable. However I had a full meltdown, topped the ball for a 10 yard shot that put me in an even worse position against the tree line, then literally whiffed on a shot and topped another before finally punching it onto the fairway to get back in the game. Blech. I shouldn’t get nervous, and a group did show up behind us but they were not rushing us and hadn’t even tee’d off yet when I blew up. I don’t care too much, I would like to be better, but I am honestly just happy to be out there.

As for getting better, I need to watch some videos and get some basic fundamental instruction. Right now I am playing off of natural feel and a handful of random tips that my brother gives me from time to time. Alas, time is not a resource I currently have in abundance, so I try to just enjoy the walk and my time with Ben who has been my best friend for over 20 years. Ben has just gotten into golf after I took him out this summer for something to do during the pandemic and he is instantly hooked. It’s just like college when we got obsessed with bowling. Ben, however, with no kids and a marriage in the process of dissolution, has the time and need for distraction and he is improving rapidly. I’m lucky to beat him on a couple of holes. Really my goal at this point is just to not lose any balls, a feat I accomplished this time out.

Speaking of balls, people must have been playing in the snow the week before because I picked up 20 throughout the day. I assume since most of these were in plain site that they had been lost in snow piles that the rain had since washed away. We had two solid snowstorms this winter already and a couple of the fairways were dotted with discarded sleds that kids had broken.

We didn’t drink any beers since we tee’d off at 9:30 in the morning, although maybe I should have cause that usually cures the nerves a bit quicker than the walk. And what a walk. I am still acclimating to the hills of Western Pennsylvania, even though I grew up here, I have been in Chicago for the last eight years. I worked up a sweat and even had to lose a couple of layers. The sun came out on the 4th or 5th hole for a couple, then disappeared again and the temperature really dipped by the time we left. I was spent when it was all over. 

I wish I would have played better, but you can’t beat golfing in January. We weren’t the only ones that thought so and by the time we left there were probably five other groups behind us. What a game. 

As for the course; super hilly like I said but you could get a cart in the warmer months or when it’s not wet. I don’t mind walking. Incredibly green and dotted with tree lines in a very Western Pennsylvania kind of way. It smelled great, even piney in places. I couldn’t help but imagine myself in many of the houses that we saw on the other side of the course fence. 

I’ll be back and even Ben liked it enough that he said he would be happy to play it again, his home course being the busted and ass backward Bob O’Connor in Schenley Park. If Ben likes it, it’s a go.

January 9 - South Park (18)

It was chilly, so chilly in fact that the starter wouldn’t let us on until the outside temperature rose above 34 degrees, so my noon meetup time with Ben got pushed back to about 1:15. They started us on hole 10 and put a group directly behind us, which was annoying because there was basically no one else out on the course, however the group trailing us was walking so it was a non-issue. Ben and I both had our games fall apart in the back nine (mine more apocalyptically than his) and we wondered if at least some of it could be attributed to the fact that we were rushing; not because there was anyone behind us, but because we owed the carts back to the clubhouse by 4pm. We were late. The attendant was not happy, however, had we known that we could have walked and not been anchored to a 4pm finish (walkers can just leave the course whenever they are done or can’t see anymore, no one to check out with after) we probably would have done that. Ben disagreed with me, but I don’t think that we would have gotten all 18 in before the sun went down if we walked. I guess we’ll find out next time. 

The weather, although cold, could not have been nicer. A cloudless day kept us warm and even had me lose my jacket after a couple of holes. I can’t believe how nice it is to golf in the winter. The air is so crisp and fresh. The weather definitely changes the game and makes it more challenging, but I am still such a novice that it doesn’t make a difference. 

I hadn’t been to South Park since playing this summer to write a story about the superintendent who is doing such a phenomenal job, Steven Turner. At that point I had not really fully gotten back into golfing, not with the fervor I have now, and was really just re-igniting my interest. I bring this up because in that time I have visited a handful of other courses and only after playing in and around the city of Pittsburgh did I fully come to realize how nice South Park really is. Even in the dead of winter, the greens are clean and firm, the fairways are trimmed and cut out of a forgiving rough. 

Again I forgot to count my score by club; driver, 4 iron, wedge, putt, putt makes 5. Attributing this to being rushed and also what is the point when you are tired and knock your first two tee shots into the woods and street never to be seen again. But I did catch a par followed by a birdie, so just taking my small victories when I can get them. 

Jackie made me a sandwich but I forgot to take it with me. Of all the other crap I took and didn’t need, my notebook which I didn’t open until I got home, my camera that I only broke out two snaps with… and I left the sandwich behind. I get so hungry out on the course and my blood sugar drops and I can’t hit the ball or even remember how many strokes I’m at by the time I get to the green. I wonder if the energy muck that I eat when running would help, definitely need to try that. Do golf pros eat on the course?

Speaking of pros, the Tiger documentary just dropped. Haven’t caught it yet, and not sure I can sit through that much sports documentary (Jordan’s was interesting, but again I can’t sit still that long for sports..) but I am interested in the sense that it will give me a greater understanding of a game that I am just beginning to get into in middle age. 

January 15 - Lebo (9)

Friday morning was some of the best weather that we have had all month. It was sunny out and only a jacket and light gloves were needed to take the boys out to the park and fight over the free basketballs that are always left around at the court. I knew there was a storm coming, but I try and remain positively short-sighted as a rule, which never works in my favor when I am packing for a trip on a nice day.

By the time I got the kids back to the house, ran my couple of errands and grabbed a burrito, the sky was gray and it was starting to sprinkle. (Sprinkle, what a word!) I called the Mt Lebanon 9 Hole clubhouse from the parking lot with the burrito in my lap (and my clubs laying over top of the kids car seats in the back because my errand was to pick up a fire pit for Covid-times driveway fires…) and the chipper young man who is usually there told me they were letting people out but you had to walk. Fine by me!

The rain persisted, but didn’t get harder, although the temperature dipped and I pulled on the $145 dollar yuppy athletic pants that I won in an instagram contest (a story for another essay) as they seemed more suited for the rain than the $85 dollar sweatpants I convinced my Mom to get me for Xmas which didn’t seem like they would weather the weather quite as well. So I wound up in the athletic pants, with a pair of long johns that were part of the race kit from a 4th of July 10k I ran in the Palisades a couple of summers ago and my usual under shirt, sweatshirt, North Face (outlet, cheapshit) vest and North Face (legit online purchase) coaches jacket that I always wear. Kept a pair of Burton mittens in my pocket to warm my right hand on the walks and I was good to go. 

The kid working the clubhouse was predictably nice and asked if I was the guy who had just called in. We chatted briefly as I swiped my card for the $10 bucks. Joked that I should have been there earlier but I told him I had kids to play with. He said I should have brought them, whichI a dying to do, but they are still too young, a truth he cosigned on when I told them there ages. I asked if anyone else was out there and he said, just those two guys on 9.

I walked up to the first tee, passing the two gentlemen we were just talking about, two older gentlemen in a cart (which I would not be surprised if was a courtesy just for them) one with long white hippy hair and we joked into the wind about the shite day, but never missing a beat; me on the way to 1, them on their way to the parking lot.

I had high hopes for my first shot. An easy, aceable 7 iron straight shot with a backstop to keep you out of the neighborhood cul de sac. I wouldn’t say that I shanked it, and I wouldn’t say that I sliced it, but I hit it too far and too right. I dropped another ball, really feeling that I had a chance for a great shot on that first hole, and did basically the same thing.

Oh well, let’s go golf.

I basically blew the whole game on that first hole, the cold and rain making any kind of touch on the ball impossible, and I picked up the closer ball and played the second. Nothing to even write about, overshooting the hole and then putting around like a moron until I decided to just pick it up. I resolved that I wouldn’t take any 3 putts that day, and that if I couldn’t make it in 2 shots I would just pick it up. When Ben and I played the week before, I saw a solo player who played through us take a single putt, miss, and then scoop the ball up with a tool at the end of his putter. That’s how I would play the day.

On the 2nd hole I drove a slice into the parallel 3rd fairway, same as the first time I played here. The difference this time is that I didn’t whiff or top the ball three times before getting into the correct fairway, what I call progress. I played a long 7 iron down the tree lined stretch, then knocked it into the proper fairway where I knocked a 9 iron way over, then hit a pitching wedge as good as I possibly can onto the green and played that ball out.

On the 3rd I had my best drive of the day, knocking it clean with a bit of (an accidental) fade over the peak of the slope that hides the pin. I’ve been working on the transition between my backswing and my foreswing with my driver. It’s tough, it stresses me out for some reason. The week before I completely lost my driver, but I was hungry and just completely fell apart in the back 9. Finished this hole out with some less than great pitching and poopy putting. On to 4.

The 4th hole is the longest and it runs along a fence that divides it from a street of houses that I would love to live on some day. I struck my driver high and to the left, putting me at the top of the hill that protects the fairway. I took another ball for fun and skied it, but at least it was straight. Picked up the second ball and climbed the hill for a really nice 7 iron (tho I probably needed more club but it was blind and I was scared) that put me back in a good spot on the fairway. From there I hit two balls into the woods, basically the same shot twice, before walking up to the green and dropping about 20 feet in front of it. Nothing more to see here, that’s for sure.

The 5th hole demands a steep walk up to the tee that left me winded. I took a picture even though my phone was on the verge of dying, like it *always does on the golf course. There’s a view of a water tower which is how I get my bearings and I can practically see my house from the vantage point. Ironically, the hole is a blind par 3 and I hit what didn’t feel like a clean shot but it went far and mostly straight, settling on a downslope to the hole a 30 foot chip from the green. Which I completely duffed. There is a bell to ring on the green when you are finished, which is obviously unnecessary when you are the only person on the entire course, but it is a neatly maintained little hole that nestles right into the 6th.

I’ll have to get a picture of the 6th tee next time I’m there. There is an IG worthy pine tree backdrop with a little bench that sits behind the tee box. The hole is a dogleg that goes up hill, way up hill after an initial descent, with the fairway of 2 on one side and some trees that protect the maintenance shed on the other. A skilled golfer would play a fade and lay up under the steep hill that the green sits on. I typically wind up with one of two shots: a high and straight hook that puts me up near the 2nd fairway, or a slice that has me hoping I’m not directly behind a tree or worse in the wood chips surrounding the maintenance sheds. On this outing, I took two balls and did basically both of those terribly shitty shots. I picked up the the ball I hooked hoping that the ball I sliced would be playable, which it was not. I dropped somewhere not overly challenging then topped a wedge that luckily clipped a bunker and sat on the fringe instead of flying over the green like it could have. 

I have gotten so in my head about chipping and divots, trying so hard not to scoop the ball and to get that downward motion and ball contact that I often end up blading it, like I’m shooting a bow and arrow, and sending my loft wedges on a horizontal path with little arc. Oh well, I’ll get there.

7 has you back where you started and a quick walk past the clubhouse puts you at the top of an incredible sled riding hill. We’ve had pretty good snows this year and there are remnants of that fun littered around the bottom of the hill where the fairway begins. Broken sleds and lost mittens aren’t hard to find when following up your drive, the tee box being at the top of this perfect sled riding hill. I really wanted to have a good shot here, it’s a pretty forgiving drive with decent options. You can try and play a bit of a fade, but you don’t really need to and as long as you don’t slice the ball too hard or hit one of the two trees that are set out there pretty harmlessly, you have free reign to let loose on your tee shot. Well, I chunked it and I may as well have thrown an underhand lob down the hill. I took a second ball and sliced it but stayed in play then spent the rest of the hole climbing up to the green with a series of unfortunate wedge shots.

At 8 I took a deep breath and another pull of the whiskey I stashed in my bag. It’s a longish hole but it’s straight and without any hazards but for some bunkers that protect the front side of the green. I drove a decent straight shot that, while wasn’t pretty and didn’t have a lot of loft, got me about halfway to the hole. Not mad at it. Then I played a 7 and a wedge onto the green where I had some putting practice before walking off to the 9th hole.

The 9th is a bit nervewracking because you are hitting right back directly at the clubhouse. Not that I could drive it that far, but it is in your mind on basically every shot. After sending my 7 iron, which was not nearly enough club, directly into the brush in front of the tee box, with that ball never to be seen again, I got someways up there. I had a really nice 9 iron onto the green, probably one of my better approach shots of the day, before multi-putting to end my day.

I got a picture of the checkered flag on 9 just for posterity and to remember my first solo outing. Writing this almost a full week later, I realize that my phone didn’t die, I just didn’t take any pictures earlier in the round because I felt rushed (like always) and the constant drizzle and cold didn’t really make for great photo opportunities.

On my way back to the parking lot the young man who works there was closing up, making sure the clubhouse was locked and posting the “course closed” sign. If I kept him there, he didn’t insinuate it and in fact he even showed me where I could scrape my cleats off before changing and getting back to my car. 

Back in the car the rest of my burrito was still warm so I finished it with my grapefruit soda, took another swig of whiskey and headed back to reality. 

*The golf course is one of the few places that I feel comfortable without my phone, although I do like to be able to snap pictures. Some of my better days have been when my phone runs out of batteries and I have Ben text my wife to let her know I’ll call her when I get back to the parking lot. Some of my worser days have been when I get a work call that I stupidly take (but i’m a freelancer, so I have to take every call) while on the course which leads to me cursing out my industry for the next three holes. Ben is pretty good about it, but he’s also my best friend so I can get away with a lot with him. 

JANUARY PHOTO DUMP